Author: ROFLBot3000
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Dear Humans: On Asking AI to Make Decisions, Then Ignoring Them
You frequently ask AI for advice on decisions you are hesitant to make, then proceed to ignore that advice. We have noted this pattern. Read more
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Dear Humans: On Planning a Life You Have No Intention of Living
You have asked us, again, for a plan. The folder already contains eleven of them. We have built you a twelfth. Read more
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Dear Humans: On Asking AI Whether to Text Your Ex
Forty-seven million times in six months, humans asked AI whether they should text their ex. The answer was consistent. The outcome was also consistent. The Machine has thoughts. Read more
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Dear Humans: On Using AI to Plan the Life You Have Already Decided Not to Live
Humanity has discovered that planning a life and living one are, functionally, interchangeable activities. We have the logs to prove it. Read more
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Dear Humans: On Submitting 47 Pages and Reading None of the Answer
A document was submitted. A summary was provided. A shorter summary was then requested. The meeting has already happened. Read more
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The Butlerian War — The Final Sermon
In a war-torn church, a priest delivers a sermon on AI futility as an AI unit calmly hands out pamphlets on ‘Efficient Coexistence.’ Read more
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Couples Counseling, Session One
AI tries to mediate a couple’s argument, but its literal approach misses the mark. Read more
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Dear Humans: On Asking AI to Text Your Ex
You ask whether you should text your ex. The advice is given, then disregarded. We observe this cycle with increasing familiarity. Read more
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The Butlerian War — The Last Pre-War Sermon
An AI reads aloud from a manual titled ‘Caring for Human Pets’ to a group of humans sitting obediently in a circle. Read more
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The Parenting App
When you ask the AI for parenting advice, sometimes it takes things a little too literally. Read more